[Cyril feels like Kolivan's words wrap themselves around his heart and squeeze. He isn't quite sure how to process the emotion that fills him. It is a kind of painful sweetness that he's never fully experienced before.
He knows now he can't be flippant with this man. Kolivan has always been very blunt with him, he can do the same.
He thinks about how much the realization that he had fallen in love with Dorian had hurt him, and tries to imagine a world where he had told him the truth, were he had been able to give Bull the dragon tooth, where he wasn't the type of man who just flirted and kept everyone at arm's length away.
He sighs, not having realized that he had been holding his breath.]
Kolivan...
I want someone who makes me feel as safe, who understands what it's like to feel the pressure of leadership and the duty to give up even parts of your own body to a cause or for your people, who is strong, and caring, and beautiful, who will show me a perspective I've never considered, challenge me to be better than I am, and who I enjoy being around.
I haven't known you for long, but it's so clear that you are all of those things. If we only are allies or friends than that will be more than enough for me.
Most people I fall for end up being that anyway.
[He feels so hopelessly exposed now, and he crosses his arms over his chest like he's trying to protect himself.]
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Date: 2019-01-18 05:14 am (UTC)He knows now he can't be flippant with this man. Kolivan has always been very blunt with him, he can do the same.
He thinks about how much the realization that he had fallen in love with Dorian had hurt him, and tries to imagine a world where he had told him the truth, were he had been able to give Bull the dragon tooth, where he wasn't the type of man who just flirted and kept everyone at arm's length away.
He sighs, not having realized that he had been holding his breath.]
Kolivan...
I want someone who makes me feel as safe, who understands what it's like to feel the pressure of leadership and the duty to give up even parts of your own body to a cause or for your people, who is strong, and caring, and beautiful, who will show me a perspective I've never considered, challenge me to be better than I am, and who I enjoy being around.
I haven't known you for long, but it's so clear that you are all of those things. If we only are allies or friends than that will be more than enough for me.
Most people I fall for end up being that anyway.
[He feels so hopelessly exposed now, and he crosses his arms over his chest like he's trying to protect himself.]