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[samahl]

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[samahl]

So I should... distance myself from him?

[ombranera]

Distance yourself from the less helpful habits you have regarding him.

[samahl]

Right now I feel like that's all of them.

[ombranera]

Well any changes you make ought to be gradual. Stopping everything all at once would disturb him and hurt more than help.

[samahl]

[This entire idea hurts. He sighs and then nods, accepting this.]

[ombranera]

[ For several long moments Zevran is content to sit, stroking Cyril's hair and back as everything they've discussed settles in. ]

[samahl]

[Cyril eventually calms down, it helps that Zevran is touching him and soothing him.]

Does this mean that you can get to the 'why' part now?

[ombranera]

Mm? Oh. Because you both have an opportunity to grow away from this and become healthier, happier people. It took a bloody war and quite a few deaths of those I cared for before I was able to do the same.

Actually I never had to, I just killed Taliesin- anyway.

I do not wish you both to waste years better spent happy tangled in this thing. So, I said something. Ignoring it was becoming difficult.

[samahl]

[Cyril frowns at that.]

You... you had to kill him?

[ombranera]

It's complicated. Very complicated, and not at all equivalent to this situation.

[samahl]

But we still made you think of it?

[ombranera]

At first, yes. It did not take long for me to learn better.

[samahl]

[He nods a bit at that and then takes another deep breath.]

Can we talk about something else now?

[ombranera]

Of course.

[ A beat. ]

So. Taas and Sam? Do tell.

[samahl]

[Cyril's eyes narrow a bit.]

I don't know why I said that. Sam is just a friend. We aren't even sleeping together any more.

[ombranera]

I can see the appeal, the broad shoulders, the good chantry boy demeanor, the magic fingers.

[ He crackles a soft laugh, dropping a kiss to Cyril's forehead. ]

Sometimes we say things that are true without our knowing it when we are distressed.

[samahl]

[Cyril hums lightly at the kiss.]

Sam isn't interested in that with someone like me. He needs... something more serious than I can give. And anyway, he's a good friend. I wouldn't want to risk the friendship.

[Then, after a moment.] Besides, I thought you were trying to push me and Taas together.

Why are you even doing that? If it's about me being serious, why not push you and I closer?

[ombranera]

Well, I suppose I am. And I have not been all that subtle about it- I must be losing my touch.

[ He snorts a soft laugh, shifting so they're less sitting across the bedrolls and more lounging. ]

Because you and he are a safer match. A better fit. You both understand enough of how one another lives and feels affection- you both expect little more than what you are comfortable sharing.

[samahl]

And you would expect too much? [Cyril asks this gently]

[ombranera]

I- am not able to offer such seriousness in sentiment easily.

[ Which is better than saying he can't at all. ]

You suit one another quite well.

[samahl]

[Cyril hums a bit in thought.]

We do, because neither of us want to be serious either.

[ombranera]

I will stop poking at this, then.

[ If they truly are content- Perhaps he has been projecting and misreading the situation.

Perhaps he is mistaken. It has happened before. ]

[samahl]

[Cyril smiles a bit and nudges Zevran a bit.]

It does mean something, that you want to, but right now things are okay.

Well, between me and Taas. I'm still pretty mortified over all the rest of it.

[Actually giving his obsession with Merrick words still left him feeling very drained and all twisted up inside.]

I think I might ask you to distract me.

[ombranera]

It is somewhat mortifying. [ He manages a soft laugh. ] Oh? What kind of distraction would you like?

[samahl]

One where I taste you, or feel you inside of me. [Cyril responds pretty easily, smirking just a bit. He needs to do something that distances himself from the turmiol of emotion this conversation made him feel.]