Yes. Kinloch Hold in Ferelden. It was my first assignment after training. I met her there. We were little more than children, really.
[Very young. Several lifetimes ago it seems at times.]
Did I ever say anything to you about any of that?
[The question feels strange, but he promised he'd not dwell on that or make it more awkward than it needs to be. Knowing what they spoke of is a good starting point.]
Yes... [Cyril never really knows how to handle this part. How do you tell someone they once told you everything dark that ever happened to them when you're a complete stranger to them?]
You told me everything, Cullen. I'm not sure if you had a friendship with your Inquisitor? But... imagine there was someone you came to trust to help you through your recovery, who you felt you could rely on, who definitely relied on you, and think of all of the things you would tell them.
That is everything I know.
So, I know about Kinloch Hold, what life was like for you there before the Blight and... what happened next.
[That's...a lot. He's spared the pressure of immediate response by the delivery of their drinks. He'd told Edric everything eventually, the stout, bluff dwarf a better friend to him than many humans had been, and maybe more understanding about lyrium itself than many could be.
He licks his lips, his hands restless before he settles them on the table.]
We were close. The Inquisitor and I. He helped me in ways I'd find hard to describe to most, but from the sound of it, I don't need to describe it to you.
[He lets out a soft breath.]
I hope I thanked you.
[As tempting as it is to refer to this other Cullen as "he," he's avoiding it for Cyril's sake. If Cyril helped that Cullen as much as Edric helped him, he deserves that consideration and then some.]
I'm sorry if this is hard for you. I believe if I were in your position, it would be...painful. I don't wish to contribute to that.
You did thank me. In rather charming ways. [Cyril replies with a grateful smile.]
And honestly, it is painful but...
It's not a new type of pain either.
I'm mostly concerned for you. It must be awkward to know that I know things that you wouldn't want a stranger to know. If it helps. I would never share your story with others.
[He nods. With as long as he has been here, he must have dealt with this issue on several occasions. He doesn't necessarily want to know with whom beyond what he has already heard.
His lips quirk a little, one corner drawing back into a half smile.]
I can't say that's the easiest thing to hear, no. But...if I trusted you in Thedas when our world was tearing apart, I think that means it's safe to say I can trust you here. When I reached out to Edric, I was at the end of my endurance. I still wouldn't have if I didn't feel like I could trust him. It's hard to imagine some other version of me being all that different.
I don't mind. Edric Cadash. Being from the Free Marches, it wouldn't surprise me if you'd heard of House Cadash. They're very enmeshed in the Carta in most of the city-states.
[He chuffs a half laugh and shakes his head.]
He never made any bones about it. He was involved in lyrium smuggling, all manner of things before the explosion and didn't cut all of those ties afterward. As it turns out, when the sky is spitting demons, Carta thugs are just as interested as anyone else in putting a stop to it. Not that I'm saying Edric is a thug.
You know dwarves. Tough, shrewd. Surprisingly sentimental if you catch them at the right time. He surprised me. He surprised all of us.
I imagine the two of you would have rather a lot to talk about.
[He's smiling, too. Who better to understand what one Inquisitor went through than another? The burden of the Mark. It's only then that he realizes there's no sign of the familiar green glow and...if he isn't mistaken, Cyril's hand isn't flesh and blood.
His smile fades, brows drawing together.]
Forgive me if this is rude. The...Mark. I just noticed.
It's 9:44 Dragon. I was at the Winter Palace for the Exalted Council. We were still waiting for a few others to arrive.
[He's not completely sure it will be a parallel or that it will have bearing, but it might. He internally steels himself for whatever he might be about to hear.]
Then... Have you noticed? The Anchor should be starting to act up. There might moments when it flares in light and pain. Sometimes it's numbness. Maybe Cadash spends a moment shaking his hand to get the feeling back, or pauses to look at it, or simply gets quiet... I'm not sure how a dwarf would respond to what is likely happening to him, honestly.
By the end of the Exalted Council, he will start to lose control of it. It will lash out, pulling him around like a puppet on a string, and attack anyone who is near with painful magic.
[That...he's honestly not sure how to process that. He doubts Cyril is lying to him or joking, not about this, not when it's clearly a difficult subject.]
I'm afraid you have me at a loss here. I feel as though I've missed something.
He's not Dalish. The elven pantheon were not gods, Cullen. They were simply very, very powerful mages.
[He sighs, because this is a lot to explain.] This is going to sound utterly and completely mad, but you deserve to know if he shows up here again...
We find all of this out during the Exalted Council because his agents make sure we stumble upon a Qunari plot to blow up nearly every major seat of power in the South. During that investigation, we uncover the truth of him as well.
We discover that Fen'Harel is still alive, that he had been in uthenera for millennia only to wake shortly before the Conclave. He gave the orb to Corypheus. He was behind everything.
He didn't know that through the Blight Corypheus could survive the explosion and he hadn't anticipated that someone would hear the Divine's pleas and end up with a piece of his magic in their hand.
So, when that hapless would-be saviour was unconscious from the shock, he approached the Inquisition in the guise of a humble northern mage with a love of the Fade and knowledge of ancient magic. He was able to hold the magic at bay because it belonged to him.
[He listens without a single interruption, focused, leaning forward slightly from his side of the table. He's right. It sounds completely mad, and yet he's clearly not mad, and if he's a liar, he's a good one, better than most Cullen has ever met. There's a ring of sincerity to all of it.
By the end of it he's frowning, and it's a gut punch, no other way around it.]
Solas.
[For the time being, there isn't a single other thing he can say, fists curled while he processes it. And then finally...]
To what end? What did he have to gain from any of that?
Maker's breath. That part isn't reasonable in the slightest. What...what is being done about this?
[Of course he can hope the details are different for his Thedas. It's highly unlikely given what he has seen of various Thedosians here so far. He drags his hand down his mouth, enhancing the frown already resting there.]
Well, the blessed Divine Victoria and Cassandra have wagered that Solas knows the Inquisition and our allies too well for us to have much of a hand against him alone, so we're making new alliances. All unofficially, of course. I'm retired in Kirkwall, if anyone back home asks.
Tevinter was one of the main places we think will be useful, but desperate times...
Charter has managed to even make arrangements to contact the Executors. Kal-Sharok is still tight-lipped as ever but they did help us against Corypheus. We're hoping somehow we'll be able to get a message to them that doesn't risk lives unnecessarily.
Everyone will be affected if he manages to follow this path. We need those he won't expect to ally together to stop him.
[It's a bit of a relief to hear that there's a solid strategy at play, all things he could see Cadash going for as well. Yes, it makes sense to disband under such circumstances, something he favored for different reasons.
He lets out a slow breath.]
I can't pretend that hearing such a thing wasn't a blow and doesn't concern me. It's good to know things are in motion. And I'm glad you were able to buy yourself some time. I'm sorry for the cost. Maker knows, as an Inquisitor, you've sacrificed more than most in the name of saving Thedas.
There never seemed to be much love lost there. They weren't enemies, but I believe both of them rubbed one another the wrong way. He was tight lipped about his personal opinions. It seemed to help him keep a professional working relationship with anyone he needed.
Yes... [It hurts to admit how much he had trusted and admired Solas. For a moment that's clear on his face, but and rather than dwell on it he offers Cullen a small smile.]
I'm sure if you ask Bull about it, he'll have a thing or two to say.
I'll keep that in mind. Up to this point, he has been closed-lipped about his own timeline. If he's aware of all of this, I believe I can understand why.
[He eyes him thoughtfully.]
I don't suppose you play chess?
[Perhaps it's time to take them away from heavier topics.]
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no subject
Date: 2020-02-23 08:19 am (UTC)[Very young. Several lifetimes ago it seems at times.]
Did I ever say anything to you about any of that?
[The question feels strange, but he promised he'd not dwell on that or make it more awkward than it needs to be. Knowing what they spoke of is a good starting point.]
no subject
Date: 2020-02-23 08:28 am (UTC)You told me everything, Cullen. I'm not sure if you had a friendship with your Inquisitor? But... imagine there was someone you came to trust to help you through your recovery, who you felt you could rely on, who definitely relied on you, and think of all of the things you would tell them.
That is everything I know.
So, I know about Kinloch Hold, what life was like for you there before the Blight and... what happened next.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-23 08:38 am (UTC)He licks his lips, his hands restless before he settles them on the table.]
We were close. The Inquisitor and I. He helped me in ways I'd find hard to describe to most, but from the sound of it, I don't need to describe it to you.
[He lets out a soft breath.]
I hope I thanked you.
[As tempting as it is to refer to this other Cullen as "he," he's avoiding it for Cyril's sake. If Cyril helped that Cullen as much as Edric helped him, he deserves that consideration and then some.]
I'm sorry if this is hard for you. I believe if I were in your position, it would be...painful. I don't wish to contribute to that.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-23 08:47 am (UTC)And honestly, it is painful but...
It's not a new type of pain either.
I'm mostly concerned for you. It must be awkward to know that I know things that you wouldn't want a stranger to know. If it helps. I would never share your story with others.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-24 01:38 am (UTC)His lips quirk a little, one corner drawing back into a half smile.]
I can't say that's the easiest thing to hear, no. But...if I trusted you in Thedas when our world was tearing apart, I think that means it's safe to say I can trust you here. When I reached out to Edric, I was at the end of my endurance. I still wouldn't have if I didn't feel like I could trust him. It's hard to imagine some other version of me being all that different.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-24 02:37 am (UTC)I'd like to learn about Edric, if you don't mind sharing?
no subject
Date: 2020-02-24 08:55 am (UTC)[He chuffs a half laugh and shakes his head.]
He never made any bones about it. He was involved in lyrium smuggling, all manner of things before the explosion and didn't cut all of those ties afterward. As it turns out, when the sky is spitting demons, Carta thugs are just as interested as anyone else in putting a stop to it. Not that I'm saying Edric is a thug.
You know dwarves. Tough, shrewd. Surprisingly sentimental if you catch them at the right time. He surprised me. He surprised all of us.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-27 06:07 am (UTC)I wish I could meet him... Though I wouldn't wish this world on anyone.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-29 03:18 am (UTC)[He's smiling, too. Who better to understand what one Inquisitor went through than another? The burden of the Mark. It's only then that he realizes there's no sign of the familiar green glow and...if he isn't mistaken, Cyril's hand isn't flesh and blood.
His smile fades, brows drawing together.]
Forgive me if this is rude. The...Mark. I just noticed.
no subject
Date: 2020-03-01 03:59 am (UTC)[He puts his own hand over the prosthetic.]
What year is it for you on Thedas?
no subject
Date: 2020-03-05 07:46 am (UTC)[He's not completely sure it will be a parallel or that it will have bearing, but it might. He internally steels himself for whatever he might be about to hear.]
no subject
Date: 2020-03-06 03:33 am (UTC)Then... Have you noticed? The Anchor should be starting to act up. There might moments when it flares in light and pain. Sometimes it's numbness. Maybe Cadash spends a moment shaking his hand to get the feeling back, or pauses to look at it, or simply gets quiet... I'm not sure how a dwarf would respond to what is likely happening to him, honestly.
By the end of the Exalted Council, he will start to lose control of it. It will lash out, pulling him around like a puppet on a string, and attack anyone who is near with painful magic.
no subject
Date: 2020-03-09 07:50 am (UTC)[Cadash is a stoic sort, but he has known him long enough to read him, when he's in pain. When he's concerned. Afraid.
He has intended to approach him about it in private but hasn't yet found the opportunity. He nods slowly.]
That...was the solution?
no subject
Date: 2020-03-09 08:10 am (UTC)[It's not a happy memory, of course, and Cyril stares at the table as he remembers Solas walking away from him.]
The magic belonged to Fen'Harel. He was the only one who could weld it without death. Some of it still lingers, but removing the arm bought me time.
Buys the Inquisitor time. [He corrects. He also assumes mentioning Fen'Harel is going to lead to questions and braces himself for then.]
no subject
Date: 2020-03-09 08:14 am (UTC)[That...he's honestly not sure how to process that. He doubts Cyril is lying to him or joking, not about this, not when it's clearly a difficult subject.]
I'm afraid you have me at a loss here. I feel as though I've missed something.
no subject
Date: 2020-03-09 08:37 am (UTC)[He sighs, because this is a lot to explain.] This is going to sound utterly and completely mad, but you deserve to know if he shows up here again...
We find all of this out during the Exalted Council because his agents make sure we stumble upon a Qunari plot to blow up nearly every major seat of power in the South. During that investigation, we uncover the truth of him as well.
We discover that Fen'Harel is still alive, that he had been in uthenera for millennia only to wake shortly before the Conclave. He gave the orb to Corypheus. He was behind everything.
He didn't know that through the Blight Corypheus could survive the explosion and he hadn't anticipated that someone would hear the Divine's pleas and end up with a piece of his magic in their hand.
So, when that hapless would-be saviour was unconscious from the shock, he approached the Inquisition in the guise of a humble northern mage with a love of the Fade and knowledge of ancient magic. He was able to hold the magic at bay because it belonged to him.
no subject
Date: 2020-03-09 08:46 am (UTC)By the end of it he's frowning, and it's a gut punch, no other way around it.]
Solas.
[For the time being, there isn't a single other thing he can say, fists curled while he processes it. And then finally...]
To what end? What did he have to gain from any of that?
no subject
Date: 2020-03-09 09:02 am (UTC)It sounds reasonable, perhaps even a worthy cause, but... He told me that in order to restore his world, the current world, our world, must die.
no subject
Date: 2020-03-10 02:49 am (UTC)[Of course he can hope the details are different for his Thedas. It's highly unlikely given what he has seen of various Thedosians here so far. He drags his hand down his mouth, enhancing the frown already resting there.]
no subject
Date: 2020-03-10 03:24 am (UTC)Tevinter was one of the main places we think will be useful, but desperate times...
Charter has managed to even make arrangements to contact the Executors. Kal-Sharok is still tight-lipped as ever but they did help us against Corypheus. We're hoping somehow we'll be able to get a message to them that doesn't risk lives unnecessarily.
Everyone will be affected if he manages to follow this path. We need those he won't expect to ally together to stop him.
no subject
Date: 2020-03-10 05:38 am (UTC)He lets out a slow breath.]
I can't pretend that hearing such a thing wasn't a blow and doesn't concern me. It's good to know things are in motion. And I'm glad you were able to buy yourself some time. I'm sorry for the cost. Maker knows, as an Inquisitor, you've sacrificed more than most in the name of saving Thedas.
no subject
Date: 2020-03-10 05:50 am (UTC)That may be true, but even knowing everything I wouldn't change it for the world.
Still, I hope Cadash fares better.
Do you know if he and Solas were close at all?
no subject
Date: 2020-03-11 09:22 pm (UTC)There never seemed to be much love lost there. They weren't enemies, but I believe both of them rubbed one another the wrong way. He was tight lipped about his personal opinions. It seemed to help him keep a professional working relationship with anyone he needed.
[A practicality he admired.]
Were you?
no subject
Date: 2020-03-12 12:42 am (UTC)I'm sure if you ask Bull about it, he'll have a thing or two to say.
A milion years later. I am so sorry!
Date: 2020-04-12 12:18 am (UTC)[He eyes him thoughtfully.]
I don't suppose you play chess?
[Perhaps it's time to take them away from heavier topics.]
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